When I was twelve, I lost a lot of my confidence. Whether this was because of a new school or the age I was, I can’t be quite sure. All I know is that where once, as a child, I would let my voice fill the space, it now stayed hidden; like it needed protecting.
I can’t be sure what it was I was afraid of but I became acutely aware of what I lacked. I lacked confidence. I lacked presence. Envious of those around me who spoke up, I focussed on their noise. The noise that I couldn’t make. The things I couldn’t say.