Thursday, 19 April 2018

Okay, let's start again

Back in my days as a mindless consumer, my favourite thing to buy was a new start.  It could take the form of a new notebook or a new jacket; a new pair of shoes or some new gear for my music.  "This," I'd think to myself, "is the start of something new.  The next chapter in my life.  A new me, more confident and capable than ever." 

I'm not sure if I really thought that these items would change my life.  But I did think that they would commemorate some new start or other.  I would fixate on the idea that this new jacket would signal the start of something new and exciting.  New-jacket-Carmen would be so much better than who she was before in that old jacket. 

I was convinced that, because I'd decided that my new purchase signalled the arrival of a new era, it would be so.  As soon as you make a decision and buy something new, that's most of the hard work done, isn't it?  Then, over a few days or so, I'd remember that I was still me and what a disappointment that would be.

I am so, so pleased that I no longer think like this; my happiness dependent on things I didn't need; riding the waves of hopes and disappointments like a ridiculously overpriced rollercoaster.

But I genuinely miss the highs.  They were so easy to obtain and that feeling of undiluted, glorious hope was like a drug.  So does being a minimalist mean living life on a constant 'medium' setting?  No, not at all.  Instead of wishing for possessions, I want credentials and experiences.  No longer do I want to be 'Carmen with the new jacket'; instead, 'Carmen who has travelled the world', or 'Carmen with the successful career.'  They take longer to obtain but the rewards are yours for life. 

Carmen x



  1. have a great day.


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